When it arrives, he looks up the photos of Matty Tyler and Mary Ann Simpson and discovers, as he suspected, that the woman he knows as Matty Tyler Walker is really Mary Ann Simpson and vice versa. From his prison cell, Ned writes to Matty's high school in Illinois and asks to see the yearbook from 1968, the year she graduated. Ned is arrested, and Matty's body is retrieved from the boathouse, verified by her dental records. At the last minute, Ned rushes toward the boathouse to stop Matty, but it suddenly explodes. Matty hesitates but eventually heads toward the boathouse, assuring Ned that she does love him. When Matty arrives, he confronts her and suggests that she retrieve the glasses herself. Or Batman sues Superman because it turns out they have houses next to each other, and Batman learns that Superman's driveway lops over the property line, and Superman is like, "Easement!" and Batman is like, "No way!" and Superman says, "Adverse possession!" and Batman says "It has to be open and notorious!" and Superman says, "I AM VERY NOTORIOUS I AM SUPERMAN!" And then Batman says, "It has to be hostile!" and Superman says, "Aw, I could never be mad at you," and they hug and agree to share the driveway since Superman doesn't actually have a car.Ned attempts to retrieve Edmund's glasses from the boathouse but notices the trip wire attached to the door. Or perhaps Batman has to take action after Alfred makes a bequest that violates the Rule Against Perpetuities (that's what Body Heat is about, by the way) and Superman is trying to take Alfred's entire snood collection for himself, and they must battle in court! Batman v Superman! Or perhaps Batman sues Superman after Superman refers to himself as "The Real Caped Crusader," and they wind up in a battle over intellectual property. In my dream version of this idea, Batman sues Superman over an incident in which Superman accidentally picks up Batman's cape at the dry cleaner's, which leads to the revelation that Superman only sees black and white, which renders his colorful costume very ironic. While it's unlikely that Batman v Superman is in fact about the epic court battle between our two heroes, I eagerly hold my breath at the possibility that it will be.
Superman would be the best name on the best driver's license that a police officer ever extracted from a drunk person yelling from the back of a moving pickup truck on New Year's Eve.
You (or would be, if you and I were ever to go to court on opposing sides of anything, which would never happen, because we would go to mediation because it's much cheaper and it would allow us to maintain our good relationship).Īnd it's typically shown that way, as a small "v" with a dot after it, not as a v with no dot. Second of all, "Dawn Of Justice" sounds like it precedes the Morning Of Reckoning, the Afternoon Of Relief, the Dusk Of Regret, the Evening Of Resignation, and the Hot Muggy Midnight Of History Repeating Itself, all leading up to Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice: The Next Day.īut most of all, the use of "v" rather than "vs." is primarily for court cases, which tend to be captioned along the lines of Me v. First of all, "Dawn Of Justice" sounds like a dirty movie about sheriffs. We learned today that the upcoming sequel to Man Of Steel will be called Batman v Superman: Dawn Of Justice. Henry Cavill played Superman in Man Of Steel and will return to go to court with Batman (we hope) next year.